Saturday, August 29, 2009
IDIOT!!!!!STUPID!!!! you thought i dun understand. i thought you know me very well. but, you proof me wrong. sometimes, you did give me moltivation. make me want to do well, want to have a better future. but after this, i dun think i am able to do well, wanting to do well, for myself. everyone thought i no emotions. dono what is angry. it is not i dono. it's i dun want to. getting angry neccessarily is not me. it's not i want to flare. it's force. it's force by all your saying. some of it really hurts me. just that no one knows that it really hurts me. you think i smile because i am happy. but i can be smiling when i am hurt. i am smiling maybe it's because i see those i love getting happy. but that doesnt means that i am happy. i am sad maybe it's because those i love is sad or i am really really sad. i thought i dote you. but your action really kills me. it really makes me hurt. it just distroy my mood, my everything. even those i wanted to share. it's not i want to care about your stuff. i hope i never will care about your stuff. but you just break the limit. i know i cant possibly control you, but i hope you really can respect me. respect me becase i am way older than you but not in age. actually, i really hate people getting me and my NIECE the SAME clothing. because it's two different generations. i dun want people to think than we are cousin instead of us two generations apart. but because i am afraid it will hurt you. that's why i never ever tell anyone about it excluding my mum. i know she's way prettier than me. but than doesnt mean that i must wear the same clothing or have the same clothing as her. it just makes me look like a clone of her. which i never wanted. all i want is that me to have my own style. it that VERY DIFFICULT?!?!?! that action you guys did just makes me feel no integrity and no dignity. it just spoils me mood. it just makes me feel very very angry. until i myself cannot stand it. you thought i may not mind. but please, some things may not seems to be this way. sometimes, i may blow it off. but at times, i might just need some musical instruments to help. no one will ever know how i feel. if you did, why did you laugh. to me, i think that THESE ADULTS IS STILL NOT GROWN UP. although, i know adults also need entertainment, but you guys are making these in people's misery. it's not i dun welcome you, but is .... PLEASE RESPECT MY EVERYTHING.
12:20 AM